I recently returned from a glorious ten-day trip to Guatemala. The idea of the trip was sparked about a year and a half ago though an Internet exchange I had with a psychologist from Guatemala City researching twin issues. Beatriz Cadena de Schwank was treating an eight-year-old twin in her practice and sought a consultation. She belongs to a private mental health group that she founded with six other women colleagues about five years ago. Their practice is called Proyecto […]
Category Archives: Conflict
Separate Classes, Different Lunch Boxes
Among the many interesting questions that were asked during my workshop and book presentation in Guatemala, there are a few that I’d like to write about in some detail. A mom of eight-year-old fraternal twin girls seemed puzzled by some behavior exhibited by her daughters. She explained how well each girl functions independently. They are in separate classes and have separate friends. So, when mom suggested that they each do a different afterschool activity, she was surprised by their reluctance […]
What’s on the Walls?
For those of you who are deciding upon a preschool placement for your twins, I want to share this beautiful article about what to look for when you visit different locations. Susan North, the author of this blog, is a parent educator who specializes in modeling mediation techniques and language to mitigate and manage conflict between children and their siblings, friends, and parents. The article was originally posted on her blog page and is reprinted here with permission. February 3, […]
Without You, Who Am I?
Recently I have been troubled by the many calls I have received from twins having difficulty coping without their sibling. A while ago, a young man in his early thirties shared his twin dilemma. He poignantly related that he does not miss his brother in a physical sense because he lives just a few hours away; rather, he misses the way he feels about himself when his brother is around—calm, secure, and confident. This pair of identical twin men had […]
If more people understood the complicated dynamics between identical twin girls, the public might be less inclined to treat them as a unit and lump them together. When I work with adult female MZ (monozygotic, or identical) twins, I am amazed and dismayed at their underdeveloped and unsophisticated knowledge of themselves and one another. Since they have had few opportunities to be separate and have primarily shared a peer group, they are shockingly unaware of their personality differences until an external event […]