Category Archives: Parenting

Defining Motherhood Your Way

When assessing a case of postpartum depression, I focus on the woman’s state of mind before, during, and after she gives birth. By talking with many new moms, I have found that the blues are attributable to disappointed expectations and overwhelming responsibilities related to childcare, work demands, partnership challenges, and household chores. A common feature of depressive episodes is a pervasive feeling of inadequacy. This can happen when we are adjusting to novel situations besides parenthood, such as going away […]

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If Truth Be Told . . .

Same-sex couples raising singletons or twins face the predicament of eventually talking about donor eggs or sperm. While some couples may choose not to divulge any information, others are convinced that providing an honest explanation when developmentally appropriate is the healthiest way to handle their children’s questions about their birth and biological heritage. While travelling home from Asia a few weeks ago, I met a gay couple who are bringing up three children—a pair of boy-girl twins and a younger […]

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What’s a Mother-in-Law to Do?

I recently attended the birthday celebration of a friend of mine who turned 85 years old. She is a vital, energetic, engaged woman who is a terrific role model for aging gracefully and graciously. This friend has developed a fascination about twins ever since we met about ten years ago. I call her the Twin Magnet because she seems to find and meet twins wherever she goes. In addition to the twins themselves, she has introduced me and my books […]

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Two Many Cooks in the Kitchen

In my work with parents of twins, I have heard many stories—both positive and negative—about their experiences with grandparents. Having recently become a first-time grandparent to a singleton, I can now relate to the dilemmas with more perspective. The most difficult scenarios seemed to involve grandparents who did not live close by. Especially during the harrowing months after the babies were born, the parents needed physical help, emotional support, and buoyant optimism to help them through the exhaustive transition. For […]

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The Big Five

The “big five” in the world of psychology refers to five personality traits that describe how people interact with the world. (If you happen to be on a safari in Africa, the “big five” refers to the animals that you hope to spot during your safari drives—lion, leopard, elephant, buffalo, and rhinoceros.) The personality traits are as follows: Openness Conscientiousness Extraversion Agreeableness Neuroticism Dr. Meg Jay discusses these dynamics and what they mean in her book The Defining Decade: Why Your […]

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