Having grown up in the nondigital era, I am still coming to terms with living in a world where no one wants or values privacy. The video clip of the reunion of the ten-year-old Chinese twins separated at birth that recently aired on the Today show seemed like an exploitative invasion of and impingement on a life-altering experience that should have been privately celebrated by these vulnerable young girls. While I do understand the excitement of unexpectedly discovering the twins’ […]
Category Archives: Parenting
Ganging Up on Mom
A twin mom with four-year-old fraternal daughters called me for help with a behavioral issue. She discussed her frustration about her daughters’ inability to be patient and considerate while she attends to one of them. For example, she described a situation in which one of her daughters demanded her immediate attention. She had fallen off her chair unexpectedly and was startled. At the moment Mom rushed to comfort her, the other daughter started to scream that she had a “drastic” […]
She Gets It!
How refreshing it is to write about a mom who understands what her identical twin sons need. Much of her success is rooted in the healthy relationship that she has with her identical twin sister. What moved me when we were chatting was how often she emphasized that her sister gave her space so as not to impinge upon or interfere with her happiness or success. Although they live miles apart, their strong emotional bond and easy intimacy allows them […]
The Other Side of Fear Is Freedom
Jennifer Senior’s book All Joy and No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenthood touches upon the many stressors of present-day parenting. The fear about giving our children more freedom to be outside the home is high on the list of parental conundrums. She writes, “By the time children get big enough to venture out on their own—to the grocery store, to a friend’s house down the street—their parents feel strange about letting them go, believing the world to be a […]
Tired of Being a Twin Referee?
My identical twin sister and I frequently reminisce about our worst fight. Although we both remember the incident with slightly divergent perspectives, the upshot of the argument was that my sister ended up with a few broken fingers after I pushed her and she fell down onto the pavement. I believe we were about seven years old at the time. When parents seem surprised and dismayed about their twins’ incessant bickering, I wonder if they are under the spell of […]