Parents of twins face a challenging dilemma in attempting to establish equitability between twins who have strikingly different temperaments, needs, and personalities. At times, the twin who appears more laid-back, self-contained, and independent begins to resent his twin sibling who actively and aggressively demands considerable time and attention. Unhappy about the competitiveness with his twin, the “quieter” one devises methods to get recognition and validation. This child might experiment by exhibiting obstinate, stubborn, or controlling behavior. He may become a […]
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Sibling Rivalry: It’s Never out of Fashion
A recent post on Facebook by a mother asking for advice about handling her twins’ constant arguing generated more than one hundred comments. I read through most of the responses, looking for recurrent themes, thoughts, or threads. Curiously, a number of adult twins wrote that fighting among twins is normal and not to worry. Parents posted concerns about biting, hitting, verbal and physical aggression, and incessant bickering. The post prompted me to reread a book published more than twenty years […]
Respecting and Treating Multiples as Individuals
I recently received a press release about an exciting event that the International Council of Multiple Birth Organisations (ICOMBO) is holding this month: International Multiple Birth Awareness Week (IMBAW) is being celebrated from 9–15 November 2020. The theme for this year is ‘Building a Global Community: Championing the rights of multiples.’ ICOMBO’s International Multiple Birth Awareness Week is held every second year. A key focus of the week is to educate communities and professionals about the unique challenges of the […]
A Scientific Scrutiny of Individuality
Recently, while I was driving, my radio was tuned by propitious coincidence to an interview with Dr. David J. Linden, a neuroscientist and the author of Unique: The New Science of Human Individuality (New York: Basic Books, 2020). Since I frequently reference individuality in my writing, I was deeply interested in listening to his perspectives and findings. Subsequently, I bought his book and decided to share some of his most salient ideas, such as the following passage from the epilogue: […]
Adult Children in Therapy
The subject of this blog post is a bit off topic because it has little to do with twins, per se. However, a recent session with a twin patient evoked thoughts that I feel are important to share. I am an avid proponent of psychotherapy, as you might presume. My own treatment shaped me in ways otherwise unimaginable. As a result, I avidly encouraged all five of my adult children to recognize its value and to seek help from an […]