Tag Archives: identity

One Step at a Time

Many parents of twins confront the daunting challenge of helping their children develop individual friendships. This is not usually an issue with boy-girl twins, vut same-sex twin pairs frequently have difficulties in this arena. A mom of ten-year-old identical twin girls recently shared a story with me that illustrates this challenge. Both girls have been in separate classrooms since kindergarten. One of the girls, Kaye, has more self-confidence than her sister, Clarissa. She is outgoing, independent, and easygoing. She attends […]

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The True Nature of Twinship

Vivienne Lewin is a colleague who has written extensively about twin relationships. She graciously allowed me to share an article about the multifaceted complications of a twin connection that she wrote for the Hippocratic Post on April 16, 2018.   Twinship: A Subversive Relationship Vivienne Lewin Twins generate a great deal of excitement and curiosity, and with the increasing frequency of twin births as a result of IVF and later age of conception, amongst other factors, it is important to understand the […]

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Societal Backlash Against Demystifiying the Twin Mystique

A few weeks ago I spoke about parenting twins to a small staff of speech and language pathologists who treat children at a private clinic. In thinking about their client population, most of the staff had treated only one twin, not both. I marveled that perhaps each twin had a separate experience that afforded her/him a respite from being identified solely as a twin. One staff member asked me if I felt that parenting awareness about twin challenges has changed […]

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One-on-One Time—Helping Multiples Create a Singular Identity

Sam, a bright young man in his early thirties, came to see me because he felt abandoned by his identical twin brother Ryan. My patient was distraught because Ryan had changed so drastically since he started to see a psychotherapist. Sam had believed unequivocally that he and Ryan were destined to work together as singers, actors, and performers. Sam had organized his entire professional life on the assumption that he and his brother would be an artistic collaborative team. However, […]

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What Did You Ever Do for Me?

I work with a pair of identical twin women whose individual temperaments are as diverse as night and day. One of the twins, Sue, is a school nurse, and the other, Ellen, crunches numbers at a food warehouse business. Much of the focus of our work has been articulating the differences in the way they think, feel, and approach life.  At times, Sue becomes frustrated when she expresses her needs and feelings because Ellen has difficulty grasping abstract concepts such […]

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